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The moon in his arms

Updated: Jun 7, 2021



They say that the Great Conjunction only happens once every 20 years— It's when Jupiter finally catches up to Saturn and they appear closest they are in the night sky. I can't help but think, oh, what a coincidence that my feelings finally caught up to yours as well, as if we were heavenly bodies with spectators awaiting the day we would finally touch high up in the sky, and we ourselves would be a spectacle to behold.


We are so many things to each other, some I've already long forgotten, but some remain up to this very day: celestial beings whose paths were never meant to cross, a young gang leader being hunted down by an even younger police officer, an empress entrusting her army and the safety of her country to a very capable war general— We are all of that and more, the most dangerous of them all was that we were the smoking gun in each other's hands, bullets aimed right at each other almost perfectly, yet we still missed.


Ours was an awful tussle of feelings that shouldn't have manifested themselves in the first place— a tug of war in which one would have to concede defeat— and while it was I who lost every emotion, it was still my victory. Because I managed to forget and live comfortably while you had to live with the idea of a lost love that was meant to be yours.


I know how it tormented you. I knew that you looked at me like a forlorn astronomer would look at the night sky— eyes ever looking upward, gazing at an unreachable star, beholding me from afar. I was that precious to you, but I refused to acknowledge it. We all know what happened the last time a celestial body tried to come close to earth— it ruined nearly everything— and I couldn't risk destroying such a fragile peace all because I simply wanted to be close to you.


I was content being your diamond in the night sky for the longest time, I knew that once I dared to reach my hand out to you that it would break hearts. I was never one for logic, but even I knew that it would do us no good at all. Even so, I continued to shine for you because I knew you were contented with just that much.


Tell me, forlorn astronomer, have you ever imagined your morning star falling from the night sky?


It wasn't the most graceful fall, but I plunge right into the ocean— and how odd it was that the waters were so warm.


Forlorn stargazer, you are the waves I once saved myself from, but now I find myself wanting to swim in you for as long as I can hold my breath. And when I drown, I know you'll carry me to the safety of the shores.


Tell me, lover, am I still as dazzling as I was when I hung from the night sky? Right here before you, am I still a dream too good to even be true? All of the stars aligned to grand your wish, but I believe it was mine they listened to. Regardless of the time and distance we've spent apart, we found ourselves gravitating back towards each other, hearts bound by an unseen force we both finally have the right word for.

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